The BBC recently reported that the Cambridge University chapter of Extinction Rebellion, a climate activist group composed of waterheaded college students, took it upon themselves to dig up a lawn at Trinity College in order to…protest…climate…things. Or something.
According to the article:
“Activists then took dug-up mud to a local Barclays Bank branch…A spokeswoman for Barclays Bank confirmed activists carrying wheelbarrows full of mud had spread it across the banking hall of its St Andrew’s Street branch.”
Why these environmental shitwits decided to drop off mud at a nearby bank isn’t really clear; the article doesn’t state the purpose, but considering these students’ uncanny lunacy, I wouldn’t be surprised if “upsetting the neighborhood capitalist system” was a part of it.
“Activists, who also chained themselves to an apple tree on the college’s front lawn, said they ‘were careful to ensure that the digging took place a safe distance from the tree so as not to cause any damage to it’.”
I’m all for protecting Mother Earth, but why do these environmental terrorists have to be so selective about which parts of her they defend? “Let’s save the world by fucking up that lawn! But let’s safeguard that apple tree over there — how else are we supposed to make our next batch of vegan apple kombucha?!”
Derek Langley, a member of Extinction Rebellion Cambridge, said: ‘The idea that a rich institution like Trinity College, which tells the world it is serious about tackling this crisis, is looking for profit from environmental destruction is quite simply astonishing.’”
Says the guy that needlessly excavated a poor, innocent lawn that was just minding its own business. Have you SEEN the stats on shovel violence against lawns? It’s getting to the point that lawns can’t even walk alone at night without getting sacrificed to a cause.
Be better, Der.
“A Trinity spokeswoman said the college ‘respects the right to freedom of speech and non-violent protest but draws the line at criminal damage and asked the protesters to leave’.”
A gaggle of wild-eyed protestors with sharp gardening tools are turning your lawn into the aftermath of a Monster Jam show and the best you can do is “ask them to leave”?
I really hope that the person who asked that question was just being “good cop” so “bad cop” could swoop in with some REAL questions, hopefully involving tough guy words like “darn”, “dang”, and “fiddlesticks”.
“Members of the group have also been taking part in a week-long road blockade in the city — prompting police to use emergency powers to shut off roads.”
Here’s a free tip for radicals: if you want to win people over to your cause, a little soundness of mind can go a long way.
This is exactly what I hate about political fringe groups trying to pass themselves off as virtuous — in their warped Weltanschauung, lunacy and hysteria are better than sanity and coherence when it comes to making a point.
It’s built into their dogmatic machinations to make it as difficult as possible for normal folks to subscribe to their cult, and ensures that only the most fanatical will join.
Maybe we should take the hint and take our business elsewhere.
Surely there are causes with greener grass than this one.